All the Way to the Gallows

All the Way to the Gallows; David Drake (Baen Books, December 1996. Cover art by Bob Eggleton. ISBN 0-671-87753-4).

You don't normally, if you've read his stories of Hammer's Slammers, that David Drake is a funny guy. Actually, as he points out in the introduction, those in combat find their own humor (however much we might not appreciate it).

This collection will prove that Drake is funny. Usually chuckle funny, but several times grinning funny or belly-laugh funny. The collection is made up of previously published stories, all for the most part in shared-universe or theme anthologies. Despite this, it is a solid collection of stuff that stands well on its own. Each story has its own introduction to help explain its origin (and sometimes as an added bonus you get a few more jokes and funny bits from Drake).

Some brief comments by David Drake here.

The Enchanted Bunny: The first story is a sequel to L. Sprague de Camp's The Undesired Princess. Baen Books republished some short works by de Camp and others in this fashion (pair them up with a sequel by one of Baen's authors). The only problem I have with this story is that I cannot, for the life of me, recall whether I've read the de Camp tale or not. Oh well, time to haunt the second-hand shops again! (Addendum: Found a copy! So I will eventually post a second review for this one, to include the de Camp tale as well as a re-read of the Drake tale!)

The Noble Savages: One of the best entries of the book, and part of The Harriers shared universe created by Gordon R. Dickson and Bill Fawcett. If you think political correctness is out of control today, imagine a future where swearing is sanitized, weapons are sanitized, rules pile upon rules...The possibility of a good tale in such a future seems impossible, but Drake manages a good and funny tale. (Addendum: Found copies of two books in this series, so I'll have more reviews down the road.)

Airborne All the Way!: Probably the weakest story in the collection. Part of an anthology for the endless Magic: The Gathering line of cards and game items.

Cannibal Plants from Heck: Now here's an anthology I'll have to hunt down. Stories inspired by tabloid headlines? Sounds like my kind of humor. Drake looks at what happens when a father lets his neglected hobby urges go a bit too far. Funny thing is, I resemble that character!

The Bond: A rather strange tale of inter-dimensional meeting points.

Mom and the Kids: A collaboration with Larry Niven for The Fleet series of shared universe anthologies. When you're captured by the enemy, you're supposed to resist. Now suppose you are a von Neumann machine...

The Bullhead: Part of Drake long-running series of fantasy stories about Old Nathan. Set in our world, our one very close to it, in a United States where elements of magic exist, I'll admit this is my first encounter as I usually ignore (except for a relatively small slice) fantasy tales. Hunting down the book, of course! My only problem with the tale is that Drake writes out the local dialect, so I 'spect it might take you some time to interpret it right. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. I'm not sure which approach is better. In Iain M. Banks and Feersum Endjinn, it didn't really work (for me). Sometimes ignoring dialect works. For examples, Clifford D. Simak wrote many books that could easily slip into Old Nathan's stomping grounds. But all his characters spoke in a very formal way (Simak was a newspaperman, and that seemed to have shaped the dialog of his characters). For me, at least, that worked. If the writer is good enough he will pull it off, no matter what the approach. Both Drake and Simak pull it off. (Addendum: Got a hold of a copy of the collection Old Nathan. I also picked up Mountain Magic, a multi-author collection in the same spirit. More reviews to come!)

The Very Offensive Weapon: This entry was part of the Baen Books anthology Forever After, created and edited by Roger Zelazny (but published after his death). Each entry took place after the big quest. Remember those last chapters in The Lord of the Rings? Imagine a whole book of finishing acts. The backstory was that several objects of power were brought together for the quest...but keeping those objects together would be Very Bad, so the stories in the anthology are how those objects were gotten rid of. The Very Offensive Weapon talks about a Ring of Power. An offensive ring. A flatulent ring. A ring that is also very obnoxious. Very funny stuff!

A note on the cover. As much as I like Bob Eggleton 's work, this cover has nothing to do with anything in the book. Nothing. Nada. Zip. I guess they had a cover hanging around the Baen Books office!

Made up of: Introduction; The Enchanted Bunny; The Noble Savages; Airborne All the Way!; Cannibal Plants from Heck; The Bond; Mom and the Kids; The Bullhead; The Very Offensive Weapon.

Counts as nine entries in the 2007 Short Story Project.